singer with Band Musika Rogora
In his spare time he is an actor and can be seen on Soviet TV in many
of the popular soap commercials and domestic dramas set in hospitals and
valleys around Newportograd.
He does not drink or take drugs, but sometimes he enjoys Cuban cigars,
fine brandy and amphetamines
Riko is married, his wife has a Prada handbag and a Mercedes Benz. He
owns 15 children
His ambition is to buy Lichtenstein and circumsize the world in a 60 foot
plays bass guitar for Band Musika Rogora
He ran away from the circus many years ago and became accomplished in fine art forgery.
Makahre now takes great pleasure in breaking the body parts of his fellow comrades whilst swinging his bass guitaree around on stage!
He collects things and is well a known bargain hunter. He can often be
found trawling Poundland and the many other pound shops in Newportograd
He loves a baaaargain!
Makahre is married and has 15 children
His ambition is to find the magical sword of 'Ringlandski'
is Band Musika Rogora Khart
Bouzouki players are strange peoples. Datshi was found in big old desserted
house near city of Newport. He was pennyless music craftsman making instrument,
panduri, from old wood and string. so when Band Musika Rogora
Khart ask "what are you doing?" Datshi say "Making instrument
from old wood and string".
So Rogora Khart say, "you
want play and sing with us?" and he say "I give it a go".
End of story. Now Datshi Cozahre is komrade and brother in arms in Band
Musika Rogora Khart.
In his spare time Datshi likes drinking 'Black stuff (when Mrs Datshi (the "Datshess")say it
OK), he also enjoys fishing with dynamite in the Newportograd River. He
never catches anything though as you can't find anything when the mud's
Datshi is married and has 15 children
His ambition is to own Powystan
drummer for Mighty Band Musika Rogora
Pyotr is banger of drums for great band musika Rogora Khart.
Pyotr washed up, from far away land, on shores of great chocolate river in little blue boat. His journey harsh, 36 hours in back of boat with nothing to eat or drink, his boat became stuck in mud. Pyotr banged frantically on side of little boat to attract attention to his desperate plight. For many days he thump with sore, bloodied hands and then madly and wildly kicked out with feet as well, until rhythmic beating is heard echoing all along great river, and throughout the whole of beautiful city of Newportograd and as far away as Cardiffstan. And people said to one another "what is that wondrous sound? Surely that is sound of great drummer". By and by komrades from band musika Rogora Khart came to hear of drumming boatman from afar. They pull him from river and made him their Komrade to make beautiful rhythm on drums.
Pyotr now has wife, Mrs Sapniskhi and thinks he has fifteen children- but he is drummer so he can only count in fours, so is not quite sure."
dances and sings with Mighty Band Musika Rogora
In her spare time Siluria likes to make things from items she scavenges
from various, unnamed places.
Siluria also likes to play the finger cymbals and sometimes practices
voodoo on Band Musika Rogora
Khart using secret, special dance moves learned from guru in
monastery in Sebastapol
Siluria also teaches her "secret" dance steps to her select band of apprentices at classes throughout
the Greater Newportograd area
Siluria has 15 children and is to married to Andriyev Robitshvili
("famous" saxaphone player from Cardiffistan)
Her ambition is to eat toast and marmite laced with pickled beetroot without
Dato is guitar
player with Rogora Khart.
He was born and raised in Newportograd. In his early years he lived in
Ringlandski, a province of the Greater Newportograd Soviet.
Dato's Grandfather was the famous Soviet Cosmonaut "Yuri Gradnahze", who would have been first man in space,
on April 12, 1961, if not for unfortunate incident when; after much celebratory vodka he fell asleep in Premier Kruschev's private bathroom
and missed blast-off. He did eventually get into space, but only to clean up after
monkeys Drema and Erosha and dog Laika.
As a child Dato played with his many young Komrades in the building rubble
near his home until one afternoon, he was taught to play guitar by a one-armed
gypsy traveller (this may account for his "lop-sided" style
of playing). From this man he learned to play the beginning
bits of “Swan Lake” and the “James Bond” theme and from
there his interest in partially learning passages of well known music
developed. And now he plays guitar for Mighty Band Musika Rogora
Dato has travelled far and wide to exotic places like Sebastapol,
Cardiffistan, Chepstonia and Englanski (visa revoked).
He is intimately acquainted with “Back of Van” travel services and NewportoFlot,
Newportograd’'s national airline.
Dato has worked hard all of his life, but has had a varied career:
A part-time Spetsnaz soldier in the Newportograd Soviet Militia serving (alongside
other members of Rogora Khart who may tell their own stories)
during the Cubanos missile crisis (where
he also taught guitar at the Buena Vista Social Club) and famously at the Battle of Bandski in Dirka-Dirkistan
(alongside Team America - Hoo-Yah!)
Dato’s other jobs have included work in a factory servicing old boilers,
as a brass monkey welder in Siberia, a flower arranger in Azerbijan,
a rescuer of "Dusky Damsels in Distress" in Sochi, and as an assassin for
KBGB's - New Portograd Division (he
still does the occasional jobs for friends and acquaintances; competitive
rates, call toll free for quote).
Now, for a meagre living, he makes Schitt© guitars that he sometimes plays with
Dato has 15 children and is currently unmarried.
His ambition is Olga Kurylenko
Ridinski is guitar
player of many strings with Rogora Khart.
We found Ridinski wandering the streets of “The Peoples Republic of Caerleonski” just after Datshi had his huge headache! We say to Ridinski “Hey you want to play your guitar of many strings with Band Musika Rogora Khart while Datshi gets better?” He say “I give it a go!”.
Ridinski sings with many voices, like beautiful choir of angels, he does silly dances and likes to drink anything gold, brown, black, fizzy or flat!
He speaks with strange accent and wears flat cap, you can see him sitting outside Caerleonski Postal Office with 9 dogs, and brown paper bag by his side…
Ridinski is now brother in Band Musika Rogora Khart.
Ridinski has wife, Mrs Dirinski and 15 children.
His ambition is to one day own The Great Dog Pound of Ringlandski.